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A Love Note Pt. 2

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Marlene - photo

Romantic Findings

Posted by Marlene

My current explorations in environment are triggered by passion. When I love, I love fully. My mother always told me, “Make sure to take care of your heart.” I never questioned her because in fact, it was very true. Many times, I’ve felt that I was finally in love, but it was just something I liked. I was blinded by a continuous fight between two thoughts, like and love. It was an ordinary day when I suddenly realized that true love was there. Ambushed by seven five-year-old students who were poking me and sweetly calling my name, “Miss Marlene, Miss Marlene,” several times, I felt the moment was just perfect. I bet you’re thinking this was a love story of how I fell in love with someone. No, there is not a man that could ever make me feel as happy as I feel when I am teaching. First of all, I don’t rely on a man or anyone else for happiness. As a very joyful individual I’ve found what sparks my happiness and I wouldn’t trade teaching for anything else. These children as I often refer to as my “kids” give me an innocent and genuine love. They may not say it in words “I love you” or “I appreciate you”, but they do know how to express it. The children I teach make me laugh and smile everyday; they bring an abundant joy into my life. More doors are opening than closing and it’s because I am driven by a passion for educating.

 

Continuing on, although I always pictured myself falling in love at age 30, I met my first love before I discovered my passion for teaching. Recently, I’ve been in a long distance relationship with my love, Ryan Guajudo Macasero, who left America for the Philippines to pursue his aspirations. He too fell in love with journalism. I was never looking for love it found me and I decided to open my heart to an opportunity of falling in love. It will be our first anniversary on October 4, 2013. It’s not what you try to find, but what finds you along the way. The feeling is right and I know the difference between liking and being in love. When you fall in love with what you are doing it feels natural. There is never a feeling of hesitation. Moreover, it took me several attempts to finally realize that teaching was for me. From wanting to attend art school to actually shadowing my dentist at her office. My journey in discovering my passion was long, but it only took me back to my days as a child. It was during playtime with my siblings and neighbors that I would create little notebooks with scraps of lined paper for everyone to write on. Everyone would then face me and there I stood confident little “Miss Marlene” playing the role of a teacher. Now, when I stand in front of a classroom the feeling is just lovely, especially when students are actively participating in class. My passion for empowering young minds through education makes every minute worthwhile.


Marlene - photo

A Love Note Pt. 1

Posted by Marlene

Falling in love was never in my plans. I always pictured myself falling in love during my 40’s only after being a successful businesswoman with financial stability, but love entered my life and literally left to pursue his dreams on the other side of the world in Asia.

 

A year before I met him, I lived in Downtown Los Angeles six hours away from where I now live in Hayward California. We first met at California State University East Bay where he graduated from and I am currently studying. Despite age, cultural and religious differences, our love of two old spirited and passionate people lead us to create a strong relationship.

 

I’ve realized that in our generation many people misuse love and are anxious to find it. The truth is it comes when it comes and when it does welcome it with arms wide open. Love unravels like the soft petals on a white rose that’s nourished by the earth’s warm soil. Although my feelings for him at first were difficult to understand because it was brand-new to me, loving him was natural.

 

He was then asked to work overseas after just several months of us being together. When we were together, I witnessed his dedication for writing and telling stories. Being a supportive girlfriend, I was always there to encourage him in anything and for him to take the wonderful opportunity to work abroad. After all, he had really deserved to put his talent for writing into good use. This is both of our first relationship. We decided to work a long distance relationship. I let him go abroad little over a year after our first year together.

 

In this relationship, separation and stress tested the strength of our love. There were several attempts to resolve a communication problem, which happens in most long distance relationships. Yet, after several trials of fixing this dilemma, I realized that there are two main steps for resolution in partnership conflicts. First, people should have immediate discussion about the problem. Second it leads to compromising. Love is like a flower that should be nourished with care and a “break” should never be the answer because it results in decay. I will never understand why he asked or why people in relationships as for a break from each other. Even when one is underneath the cloud of stress, a break shouldn’t be the answer to untie a struggle. I gave him the break and space for growth as he initially requested, but without me in his life. I also understood that his physical and emotional care for me was missing. At the end, it was absolute I needed to take care of my heart. It wasn’t easy, it took so much courage and strength to accept that maybe it wasn’t the right time for us/bad timing. I don’t regret making this decision because our love story is something that I’ll always treasure.


Marlene - photo

A Love Note Pt. 2

Posted by Marlene

Long distance relationships are neither easy nor difficult to overcome, but trust, novelty in communication and being patient are key factors in stable relationships. Not only do we find some of these factors in a romantic relationship, but also in many other types of bonds (e.g., friendships, mother and daughter, teacher and student etc.). Had I been selfish and stubborn I would have insisted to keep him in my life. But my parents taught me that loving is patient, kind and mindful. As William Shakespeare said “the course of true love never did run smooth”. Life is a mystery and we can only untangle the mysteries after they have occurred, then is it only ok to interpret the incidents that happen to us. Still, loving another being has been more than just a beautiful experience and being in love changed my perspective on what fate and destiny mean.

 

College is a prime time to find your true self, and discover new goals. I would never change meeting my first love because he helped me grow and taught me about love. I’ve never had the privilege of living in a house, owning expensive clothes or a car, but I have had the privilege of falling in love.

 


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